MUSIC <3

I feel like writing a note for no apparent reason and I thought I'd try something a little different from my dank, dark, depressing norm, haha. I thought I write about something I love; I thought I'd write about music.

There are so many great quotes about music, but I think my favorite is "Music speaks the words I am too afraid to." I honestly don't think there is a single song on my iPod that does not remind me of someone (not a singular person but many someones; and by that I mean male and female friends and enemies...people). There are so many songs that I wish I had the courage to say. But you can't. You can't walk up to someone and say "Why can't you see, you belong with me?" or "Here's the thing, we started out friends; it was cool but it was all pretend." You can't do that. Not only would you sound like a retard, but the words lose there meaning; they need the music to back them up. And that's one of the many things I love about music and I love about singing: when you sing, you can say all the words you'll never get too and they can have all the meaning you intend them too. It's incredibly therapeutic to be able to just let go like that, to just "say what you need to say." (That's not to say that every time I sing a song that I'm singing it to someone, however; generalization get one no where when it comes to analyzing my mind. I am all about the specific situations.)

But music isn't just the words literal meaning; there's almost always more. You can almost always dig deeper. You can rock out to Fall Out Boy and listen to a rock and roll love song that has a double meaning about society and family and media and relationships. It's like poetry, and yet it isn't. It isn't just words on a page written by a writer and left to the interpretation of a reader. It's music and harmony and words swirled together in a symphony of magic.

I don't know that I can truly explain what music means to me. Maybe it's because it's what I know. I grew up listening to my dad's band practice, hearing my mom's old recordings, playing tambourine or singing on stage with the guys, memorizing song lyrics; it's like breathing to me, it's just natural, it's just who I am.

It isn't just past or present or lyrics or composition though, it's what music does in the here and now. If I'm sad, I turn on my iPod. Music can get me through anything. It's helped me survive, arguments, embarrassment, heart ache, auditions, bad moods, and everything in between. It helps me survive the bad days and it makes my good days all the better.

I don't know that this makes any sense. I kind of feel like nothing I say ever truly does. But what I can say is that music is my everything. I can tell you that if there were no music, I would honestly not be alive today. It has given me so much and I can't imagine life without it.

As long as I have my iPod and favorite headphones in my pocket, I know I can survive anything.<3